Category Archives: Holidays

Rethinking Resolutions

Hi Everyone – miss me?  Yeah, I missed me too.

Historically, New Year’s would roll around and I would think “oh yeah, blogging.  Writing.  It’s a form of therapy for me.  Better get on that.” and then I’d come on here, write some post about my resolutions for the next year and then a few posts later, life would happen again and I would abandon the whole thing all over.

This year is a bit different.  This year, I didn’t really make a “resolution” per se.  Actually, I have been mulling the whole idea of “resolutions” over in my head.  I kinda think they’re dumb.  Unless you’re super goal oriented, super focussed and dedicated to the changes you want to make, you’re basically setting yourself up for failure.  And who wants to start their year off by setting a hollow goal?  Uh, not this chick.  Not anymore anyway.

Resolutions, to me, signify that you’ve realized *a* change has to be made.  Who knows what that change really is.  Maybe it’s eating healthier, getting more exercise, watering your house plants, putting clean socks on.  Whatever it is, the base of it all is that a change has to be made.

The thing I’ve come to realize about change, and I’m talking real, substantial, lasting change, is that it really doesn’t happen overnight, or at New Years, or in two weeks.  Real change, substantial, long-lasting change happens over time and in very small increments.  It all starts with a decision, a realization, a “light-bulb” moment if you will but then the real work, the real change comes with small decisions you make over the next period of time.  It’s like retraining yourself to think, perceive, act, feel differently than you have in the past.  It’s almost like training a dog – training a dog doesn’t happen in two days, two moments or even two months.  The decision to GET a dog takes seconds but then it’s years of hard work, patience, failure, and persistence.  Changing yourself is sorta the same thing.

Sure I need to lose a few many pounds, sure I need more exercise, sure I need to achieve some of the goals I’ve shuffled to the wayside but really the only thing I’m resolving to do is be patient with myself.  Acknowledge my changes, accept them, keep working on them because I really like who I’m becoming.  I like the direction my life is headed.  The other things will fall into place once I get myself to a more comfy place.  And that’s happening.  Slowly but surely.

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Eager Easter

Easter is right around the corner and lots of folks are focussed on the Bunny, celebratory dinners and the inevitable chocolate hangover.  Other folks are also focussed on the religious aspect of Easter, the death and resurrection of Jesus. 

Over the years I haven’t put much thought into the whole death and resurrection bit.  I’ve gone to Church, I understand what it all means but I’ve never really thought about it.  I’m talking in a how-does-this-relate-to-me kind of way.  Now I’m starting to think about it.

This time last year, I was still deep in the ditch I had dug for myself, waivering between anger, sadness, embarassment, guilt and a myrid of other emotions.  I was walking the thin line of choice and change.  I expected that change to occur immediately but I was wrong.  So very, very wrong.

The person I was compared to the person I am is like comparing apples to oranges.  There are similarities, for sure. Both are round, both are fruits, both grow on trees, they both have seeds, they come in a variety of types and flavor profiles…really the similarities between apples and oranges are greater than one thinks; however, there are many differences as well.  They’re just not a subtle.

My differences are subtle.  I am blessed with the opportunity to practice these differences and I’m blessed to be able to actually see the change.  That doesn’t mean the same old girl isn’t kicking around in this body, it just means how she’s interacting with the world and the people in it is a little different.  I’m grateful for each new encounter, I’m grateful for each opportunity to be a little more positive, I’m grateful to have the strength to change and I’m grateful for the set backs I’m sure to encounter.  I’m grateful that the people in my life are starting to see and trust in the changes I’ve made and I’m grateful they are all so supportive of who I am. 

I totally get the death and resurrection thing now.  Maybe I just never realized that it’s not always physical.

“…May the past be the sound
Of your feet on the ground
Carry on…”

Happy Easter Everyone. 

 

Hoppy Easter